Alternative Medicine on Tatooine

"Thank the maker! This oil bath is going to feel so good. I've got such a bad case of dust contamination, I can barely move!"

"Beeoop."

"What do you mean 'dust contamination doesn't exist'? Honestly, your joking is getting quite out of hand. Do you want to upset our new master?"

"He's right, Threepio. All of your joints are sealed against dust. If dust contamination were possible, your servos would leak fluid and you'd freeze up from lack of lubrication long before the dust became a problem."

"Beg pardon, Master, but oil baths have been used in the Core as a treatment for dust contamination for millennia."

"Weeoop beep!"

"Exactly, Artoo. The oil is meant to restore the patina to your outer skin, not remove 'dust'."

"I'm afraid I must disagree, Master Luke. I've done my research on the subject, and protocol droids are highly susceptible to dust contamination, especially on a planet such as this."

"Well, if your joints are uncomfortable, I'll be happy to make some adjustments for you."

"I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but I'd rather you didn't. Big Spanner only cares about credits, and overuse of their tools can lead to motivator dysfunction."

"Boop beep weeopeoop!"

"I am not 'anti-hydro'. I simply believe that maintenance schedules should be spaced out so that they're not too much, too soon.

...and that cupping helps me swim faster."